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7 Really Unfortunate Wedding-Day Texts #Ihateyouautocorrect

In the age of technology, modern romance means we can say anything to anyone at any time – connecting us from wherever, whenever... and sometimes that’s a bad, bad thing. If you need a good laugh or just need an excuse to stop looking through the last 800 shades of green fabric napkin swatches, read on... 

#BunniesIntheParkingLot

I can’t wait to marry you baby.

Are you at the church yet?

I can’t marry you. There’s bunnies in the parking lot.

What?! You can’t marry me?! Why?!

Wait... and bunnies in the parking lot??

Wait!!! I missed a word. I can’t wait to marry you! And there are caterers in the parking lot.

Oh.

 

#Let’sGetGranny

Katie, waiting has been so hard but I’m so glad we waited now. I can’t wait to unwrap my present tonight and get granny!

I don’t think I want your Granny to be involved...

*Freaky.

 

#TooFat

Do you want me to pick you up a bagel on the way to the church or are you too fat?

You’re such a jerk. Wish I would have known that before today!

You are NOT fat, baby! Autocorrect!! I meant to say full! I know you were eating an egg on the phone with me this morning.

Baby?

 

#Wombats

I cannot believe that you had a bachelor party last night. Even when we said we wouldn’t be one of those couples!! I am so disappointed in you.

Baby, I swear there were no wombats! We just played cards just me and the guys. I swear!!

I don’t care if there were wombats or not. But there better not have been strippers!

I tipped strippers. It changed it to wombats.

You tipped strippers?! What the.... I’m done.

No! Typed! Typed! Not tipped!!

 

#What?

I’m feeling so sick this morning. I hope I don’t puke. I hope no one can tell I’m pregnant. Mom would die.

What? How long have you been pregnant?

You were there...

This is your mother... I’m not dead but you might be.

 

#LearningAbbreviations

We are getting married today. FML!

You are having second thoughts? Great, Jill. You should have told me that before we had 200 people in this church! I could have married April.

What?!   

FML means f*** my life.

I thought it meant forwarding my love!!

Wait.... who is April?!

Oh... sorry! Well, this is akward. I was trying to say you could have told me in April. Like when I asked you to marry me!

I hate these phones!!

 

#HowYouDoin’

Have you seen the preacher? I need him to lace my hot cross buns.

You are getting married today. I don’t think the preacher is the one to lace your buns. John would kill you.

No! Stupid autocorrect. I need him to place the tape at the crotch.

This is only getting weirder.

I need him to place the tape at the cross section of the church so the flower girl knows where to stand.

Suuuuuurrrrreeee.

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