How To... Deal with badly behaved wedding guests
Everything is perfect! All the planning you did came together and you and your new husband are enjoying the wedding day you dreamed of. Then one of your guests goes a bit wild - what do you do?
We’ve all heard about wild wedding guests who stole the limelight or, worse still, ruined a wedding. But what do you do when one - or more - of your guests goes too far and how do you know you're not just having a bridezilla moment? Read on...
Have your team ready
First thing’s first! If you have a feeling that some of your guests will cause trouble, then get a team of people together who can act as security for you. This means they are the people who are on hand to help if anyone goes too far or causes a scene. When (or if) anything happens they are ready to step in and deal with the situation rather than leaving it to a random guest who might not know how to handle a particular person.
The late arrivals
While this isn’t the biggest wedding sin a guest can commit, it is annoying when people turn up late. If your family has a habit of being late for things, you can add an extra half hour to the start time on the invitation. You can also wait for latecomers to get seated before you start the ceremony. But, don’t feel you have to wait for anyone and don’t get too angry about people who don’t make it on time. The reason they are late might be out of their control, so go easy on them. Just look into your beloved eyes and forget the rest of the world (including the people who turn up halfway through the ceremony).
The past love
There have been weddings where a guest has realized they wanted to be the one getting married (think Jackson and April in Grey’s Anatomy). If someone turns up and tries to break up the wedding and declare their love, let someone else in your team deal with it (unless you love them too). Just smile and focus on the person you are marrying and they should get the message.
The unexpected plus one
There’s nothing more annoying than one of your guests bringing someone to the wedding when they didn’t have a plus one on their invitation! Rather than getting mad, see if you can get them a place at a table, but let them know they might not be able to sit with their date. If someone brings their children who weren’t invited then you shouldn’t make a scene. Try and accommodate them too, although you might have to deal with questions from other parents who left their kids at home.
The drunk guest
The last thing you want to deal with on your wedding day is a guest who doesn't know their drink limit and is totally smashed! We all know someone who is partial to a drink or two and you can’t not invite a close family member because they drink a bit too much. You can ask some of your family members to keep an eye on them, but there’s always the chance that someone’s going to have one too many and go a bit wild. So before they start stripping in front of your grandparents, get some friends or family member to lure them away from the dance floor and take them outside for some fresh air and water. If this doesn’t work or people get angry then as bride or groom you can try diffusing the situation. Take the person aside and sit them down for a slice of cake or a snack and have a conversation about the day. Try and keep them calm and then they’ll be more open to the idea of going outside for some fresh air.
The missing guest
Your Uncle Billy has had a few too many brandies and has vanished into the night. Keep calm! As bride and groom it is not your job to run around in the dark looking for them. Get your team on the case and let them worry about where Billy has gone. Whatever the outcome (he's probably asleep under a tree), don’t bring up the incident in any speeches and risk embarrassing the person and further upsetting their family or friends.
The wedding crasher
If you’re getting married in a public venue then there is always the risk of wedding crashers – people you don’t know enjoying the wedding and your wedding food, drinks and favors. This is one to get the team to look out for – but make sure they check the crasher isn’t actually a distant cousin you haven’t seen for 20 years! You should be able to spot any wedding crashers in the crowd because they will stick out from your other guests. Keep calm and if nobody knows who they are you can speak to your wedding planner or a manager who will ask the unwanted guest to leave so you can enjoy the rest of your celebrations in peace.